AMP
The Official Student Opinion and Satire Magazine of UTD
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Satire
The Essential Anatomy of a K-Drama Main Character
Disclaimer: Based on scientific research conducted during finals week from a large sample of Korean and Chinese dramas to compile the list of the most suitable traits for a female lead in a successful romance. Be poor. Starting off easy since we’re students and already prone to being broke and hungry with no prospects because […]
Featured
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Satire
The Limosia Experience
This week I visited a recently opened high-end restaurant named “The Limosia Experience”. This establishment prides itself on serving diverse and authentic dishes with a sophisticated twist. I’ll admit it’s a bit expensive, but I went, despite this, to see if the food was worth the price tag. I made this sacrifice for you, dear […]
Print Issues
Satire
A Student’s Guide to Self-Care
Welcome, Comets. You may have stumbled onto our campus under the impression that college is solely about getting a higher education. But you’re more than a student. Here at UTD, we strive to create a community that enables you to grow into the well-rounded, highly-successful, not-one-bit-mentally-ill adult you can surely become. Simply follow these tips […]
Print Issues
Satire
A Typical Student Government Debate (How would you know otherwise?)
The following is a full transcription of the UTD Student Government debate which took place on March 28th, 2022, at 6PM in the SSA Auditorium. No edits have been made for clarity. Moderator: What up broskis, welcome to the student government debate! My name’s Tyler Bro-hardt, and I’m nominally moderating the debate today! We’re gonna […]
Print Issues
Satire
Florida Man Creates the Best Educational System in the World
I don’t understand why people are so focused on improvement and change; you know how the saying goes, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” There is a reason why archaic American systems have been used for so long, because the same old, white men have been in power since this country has existed. One […]
Opinion
Print Issues
Nostalgic Artists You Should Listen To
The coronavirus pandemic has left us to rekindle a love for music artists in the past few years. Ranging from pop, rock, and even country, it’s been a time for us to show great appreciation for those we love and to discover bands and singers who capture our hearts. Backstreet Boys Performing another iconic tour […]
Opinion
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Dallas is the best city in Texas.
On a recent Reddit thread identifying the most generic big city in the United States, Dallas was mentioned several times. One user called Dallas “the largest city that lacks a soul in America.” Another user insisted it was “the most uninteresting city in the country” and that “once you’ve seen the 6th Floor Museum and […]
Opinion
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Streamers and Their Influence
On April 1st, 2022, a war began. This was not a war waged overseas, nor was it fought with artillery, or ebbed with mind games. Rather, thousands of troops were mobilized, alliances formed, and families rallied by online streamers to suit one purpose: crafting images pixel-by-pixel, through a burgeoning Reddit forum known as r/Place. This […]
Opinion
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How to Learn a Language
Learning a language is a highly rewarding experience. The most obvious benefit is that it enables you to communicate with many more people than you could before. This is valuable even just here in the States. For example, a doctor can better treat Spanish speakers if the doctor speaks the native language of their patients. […]
Opinion
Print Issues
Hamsters and Fish: Not-So-Easy Beginner Pets
Many people see hamsters and fish as great beginner pets, especially for children. How hard can it be? All you need for a hamster is a small, colorful, plastic cage and some packaged food, right? What could a small betta fish need more than a bowl, water, and some cheap fish flakes? But these small […]
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Local Eats
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UTD Eats: Asian American Pacific Islander Month
SWEET HUT Bakery & Café (Plano) There’s a little place off Coit Road where a group of like-minded individuals can come together to chew on great ideas and great food. Like the coffeehouses of yore, the finest minds of our generation congregate here. I’m talking, of course, about SWEET HUT Bakery & Café in Plano. […]
Features
Horoscopes
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May Horoscopes: Taurus Time
Aries: How are your anger management classes coming? Taurus: This is your season! Spring has sprung! It’s time to finally do the wardrobe overhaul you’ve been dreaming of. Just make sure to watch your budget while you’re surfing Depop. Gemini: You’re not paying tuition for nothing. Take advantage of university resources while you still can! […]